Yesterday was a day where God gave back all of what vaccine injury has taken.
At least for the day.
It has been almost two years since Brandon has been on a horse. We were finally able to get him in a Therapeutic Horse Riding program paid for by the state (because, well, who has money for "extra's" given all the money we spend on basic keep-him-alive vaccine injury essentials?!) and then were dismissed from the program after a few semesters because of lack of consistent attendance caused by the seizures that were caused by the vaccine injury. The very vaccine injury that even necessitated we seek state services for anything.
We were bummed to say the least, but we understood. Sort of.
And then came this past week.
A call out of the blue from that riding center.
I almost didn't answer it. Figured they had not taken us off the call list for fundraisers or something. But I answered. And it was someone inviting Brandon back.
I was shocked to say the least.
They said in retrospect, they could see that even though his attendance was sporadic because of seizures, that the few times he was there, they could see he was benefiting, and so they wanted to have him back.
I chuckled a bit inside at the hilarity of that.
Not many people want our kids, let alone invite them back.
Sad, but true.
I've never received a call from any program wanting Brandon.
So to get a call from a program wanting him back - was really a special thing.
So, as you can see in the pictures, we went back.
I was a nervous wreck the day before he was to ride again.
"God, I know you kind of like to mess with me sometimes, but please, don't let our first day back be one I have to cancel because of a seizure, the reason we were dismissed from the program in the first place......"
Well, not only did Brandon not have a seizure that day, but the rider before us was running (or riding?) late and so Brandon had to sit in a chair for a good 10-15 minutes to wait for his horse. And he did it. He sat there and was still and did not have a meltdown.
When it was time to get on the horse, I was fighting off a panic attack in "please God, the helmet. Can you place an Angel on each of his hands so he can't pull off the helmet and then could you magically not make him even feel the helmet to want to take it off! Please, don't scare off these volunteers the first day. Don't traumatize this innocent horse by Brandon having a helmet meltdown."
But nothing.
It was like Brandon didn't even know the helmet was there.
Then I was like, "Wow, God, you are good! Do I dare even begin to breathe again lest this moment be imagined and by taking that next breath I break the spell?"
No magic.
No spell.
Just God.
Brandon, as you can see from the few decent pictures I managed to capture through my crying at the HOPEISM of it all, had a great time.
He remembered how to get on the horse like he'd been riding all along.
It was special to witness, he really enjoyed his 'hands free' riding while bouncing and giggling.
That's not to say the next ride could be vastly different, but it's for the rides like this day - that I came to realize the unfairness of how success for our kids is measured.
He was dismissed because he wasn't meeting a predetermined level of attendance, and therefore goal progression toward success.
It's that way with this riding program, it's that way with most "schools" for our children.
Insurance won't pay unless you are meeting a predetermined level of mastery.
Insurance won't pay if it takes too long to reach that arbitrary level of success.
I take such issue with that because it is because of (for most of us) vaccine injury that our kids even need these programs, these schools, the extended therapy.
It is not our kids fault they need that - yet they are the ones punished because they don't meet the predetermined outcome measures.
I'm sorry, maybe if he was only maimed by 4 vaccines and not all 12 we would meet your criteria.
It's yet another maddening form of discrimination against our kids.
I can not find a program that is suitable for his needs, because what he needs in a day program you cannot "bill for" to get reimbursed for insurance.
I could not find a leisure program with benefits for him (Therapeutic Horse Riding) that would not exclude him because of attendance issues from the seizures from the vaccine injury.
It is a pattern of gross negligence that we are allowing to happen to our children.
Our government maimed our children.
The vaccine industry caused Brandon's injuries to need a special school, a special day program, this special riding program.
It is not something I want for him -- that he needs these things is because something was done to him and insurance, the state, the government - must pay for that whether or not he ever reaches any predetermined length of therapy, goals, attendance, or level of mastery.
Period.
You cannot have caused such injury in our children, then exclude them or not pay claims or tuition or therapy for them because their level of injury is just a bit too inconvenient.
We must demand change in how we determine success for our children, youth, and adults in these programs.
I think that the smile in the first picture - the smile from him being able to do something everyone else can do -- is exactly how you measure that success.
And if that becomes too expensive - the states, the insurance companies, our government, - must finally wake up and punish who it is that needs to be punished -- and it's pharma, not our kids.
You cannot allow the continued maiming of our children then deny them services because they are too injured, too inconsistent because of that injury, or need the service for too long.
Our kids have been through hell, they deserve some HOPEISM.
However often or inconsistently they can get it.
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